Featured Writer - Elizabeth Moran
They say “home isn't a place, it's a person”... and I was knocked to my lowest of lows when i sat on my couch one night seven months ago and realized i was no longer “home”..It wasn’t that i was treated bad, or that i was miserable..it was just not how i envisioned “home” for the rest of my life to be. It wasn't the first time i had thought it though, and i knew that things would never be like they were during our “honeymoon” stage of the relationship. But, I would say what and how i felt, and things would become AMAZING for all of a month and then BOOM, back to the same old song. --
But it’s just your normal and you just push through because it is what you know.
You do what you're supposed to do for your man and with little or nothing for thanks or gratefulness in return, it's just your normal.
You have dinner ready and he will say “I’ve already ate”.. It’s just your normal.
You go to watch a movie and get dinner, but its his choice on both because, well, that just your normal.
Weekend plans? Probably nothing, because he didn't want to. That's just your normal.
I settled with this. I settled because it was all i had known. For FIVE years, me and him. My first “real” relationship. My family loved him, his family loved me, and more importantly, i loved him! And i have no doubt that at some point he loved me. But did he APPRECIATE me? Did he DESERVE me? NOPE. He didn't. And the bad thing is, i knew that. My friends CONSTANTLY told me that. But being with the same person for a half a decade, seemed like where i was supposed to be for the rest of my life no matter what the circumstances(also, the correct answer to this is HELLZ NA GIRL). Yeah i know, girls hear it all the time.. “Dont settle for less than you deserve” or “he doesn’t even deserve you” and you know what, you’re right. You are all exactly right. And we know it, but we don’t want to believe it. You do not want to believe that the man that you have given your all to, and have put so much time, effort, and love into, does not deserve you. But sometimes, it takes a slap in the face by reality to make you get up off your ass and do something about it. I remember my breaking point, and although it was the hardest day i have ever had to date, it was the BEST day. Although i didn’t see it then, packing my shit and leaving was the best thing that could ever happen to me. I'm here to tell you, it hurt like a sonofabitch. But then one day like a month later i was like, “seriously..do you know who the fuck you are?” and now here I am living my complete best life guys. All it takes is a stand. Stand up and get the respect you deserve. Five months, five years, it does not matter. If they wont respect you, you WILL find someone who does.
Do not let any man make you feel like you are not important or like you ain't a bad ass bitch. Because you are. And when you finally realize that it’s no one but yourself stopping you from getting treated like a queen, you’ll make boss moves and make yourself happy. You deserve happiness. You deserve to be told you're beautiful. You deserve to FEEL beautiful every single day. Do not settle just because it is all you know. Truth is, it’s not all you know, it just comfortability. And i don't know if y'all have ever worn jeans, but settling is about as comfortable as wearing jeans. lol -- Get you a man who makes you feel like leggings, girl, not jeans.